Depression Mode
So lately I have been in a bubble planning things for our baby that should be due to arrive sometime in October. My husband and I have been so excited planning and researching everything we need to do for this adoption to go smoothly. The Maihi Family(The family we are adopting from) just recently turned there Internet off so we haven't been in contact as much like before. Just the phone calls with phone cards (which suck)and cost money.
Well tonight I asked my husband to call because she was suppose to go to the hospital and I wanted to make sure she was ok. Well he talked to her tonight and we found out she's really sick, blood pressure is high and she gained 40Lbs in 2 Months which is not normal. Her doctor is concerned that something bigger is wrong with her. I don't know how to feel right now cause I know her health is most important especially cause she has a family of her own to take care of.
My husband just went to sleep after being so depressed as well and I am acting like I don't care cause I don't want him to see me balling my eyes out. I wouldn't want her to think she needs to have the baby especially if the doctor is advising her it wouldn't be a good idea for her and the baby. I do understand that if her health is at stake she needs to do what's best for herself. I am not depressed at the fact that this is all happening especially when everyone is excited for us as well.
I am so depressed that I myself have not been able to become pregnant on my own. I want to cry so bad right now. I feel like I'm ready to take that next step but it seems like every time we get close to it finally happening something happens. If I don't get my period this week this will mark officially 3 months. I took a pregnancy test so many times to know I am know not pregnant but I am going to schedule a appointment to find out what's wrong.
Im sorry if anyone is bored reading this....I feel so depressed and I feel like something is missing in my life right now. It's a feeling I can't explain I honestly feel empty and heart broken but I know heavenly father has something in stored for us....(gonna go cry my eyes out now) [Depressed Mode In Full affect yes I am throwing myself a pity party] Hope things workout for us ;(
Well tonight I asked my husband to call because she was suppose to go to the hospital and I wanted to make sure she was ok. Well he talked to her tonight and we found out she's really sick, blood pressure is high and she gained 40Lbs in 2 Months which is not normal. Her doctor is concerned that something bigger is wrong with her. I don't know how to feel right now cause I know her health is most important especially cause she has a family of her own to take care of.
My husband just went to sleep after being so depressed as well and I am acting like I don't care cause I don't want him to see me balling my eyes out. I wouldn't want her to think she needs to have the baby especially if the doctor is advising her it wouldn't be a good idea for her and the baby. I do understand that if her health is at stake she needs to do what's best for herself. I am not depressed at the fact that this is all happening especially when everyone is excited for us as well.
I am so depressed that I myself have not been able to become pregnant on my own. I want to cry so bad right now. I feel like I'm ready to take that next step but it seems like every time we get close to it finally happening something happens. If I don't get my period this week this will mark officially 3 months. I took a pregnancy test so many times to know I am know not pregnant but I am going to schedule a appointment to find out what's wrong.
Im sorry if anyone is bored reading this....I feel so depressed and I feel like something is missing in my life right now. It's a feeling I can't explain I honestly feel empty and heart broken but I know heavenly father has something in stored for us....(gonna go cry my eyes out now) [Depressed Mode In Full affect yes I am throwing myself a pity party] Hope things workout for us ;(
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